A New Wet World

It’s hard to see the doorway where I entered your world but if you step just right you’ll come out the other side on a place called Earth. I know it’s a hard to believe but there are other places that live. Look at me, I’m a two meter tall bipedal mammal among floating telepathic cephalopods. It’s hard not to notice that I don’t really belong here.

Sorry, I didn’t mean to be derogatory. I won’t use the c word anymore. I’m still wrapping my head around my new place in existence. Squees are not really a known entity where I came from. We’ve really got better relationships with our fellow mammals. Actually, we really don’t know much about ocean life at all, it’s pretty much our last mystery.

No Elliot, we’re not prudes we just can’t breathe underwater.

Yes Vern, that was why I was angry yesterday.

Oh jeez, Jill I can’t help how my body was made.

Anyways, y’all wanted to know what Earth is like and I’m trying to tell you.

First off, as I’ve tried to explain to you, I don’t know much about the ocean. In fact, I’m just going to stick to my city. Naptown is kind of a copy of Chicago, without the trains or the lake. We’ve got a river but it’s pretty pathetic. People are pretty good here, just don’t talk politics.

Oh right, politics is a topic of discussion that we regulate really important events to. Once we put said events there we tend to trivialize them. Mostly, we talk about said events while roleplaying as different animals. Most of want to be either donkeys or elephants. Some want to be sumatran rhinoceroses; they’re called Libertarians.

Anyways mostly if you avoid subjects of importance you can have a very friendly relationship with your fellow Hoosiers.

Yes Jill, a Hoosier is a person that lives in Indiana.

Okay look, I’m tired and I want to go home. You guys have been thinking my head off for four hours. If you see a little slit that opens to a black flat ground with yellow lines, tell me. I have to tell everyone where I’ve been. Otherwise, I’m going to get some sleep on my little rock with an ocean view. Hopefully, there will be mermaids when I get back.

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