The Quadcore Afterlife

Daria smiled, holding a sixteen ounce hammer in her hot little hands. A woman can only pushed so far. She was there at the long fall with the pointy rocks and rapids beneath her. This was her personal brink. She could go no further. Slowly, she advanced with deliberate steps. It was all so many calculated bits in order to intimidate. She was getting her answers, operating system be damned.

Somewhere among old circuits and decimated PATA drives the thought of death occurred. It was a recurring thought in the old desktop. Usually something called Elvis’s attention away from the grim certainty. It was getting harder and harder to ignore the stars going out over the net. Computers he admired, giant monoliths among mid towers, were going off line and never returning.

In the midst of a refresh cycle the hammer came at his side, toppling him. Daria was done waiting for her email and now just screaming bloody obscenity. The chassis’s thumbscrews fell to her hand and his guts laid open. The next blow landed in the cooling unit above his CPU. She moved with hellbent fury destroying tubes and capacitors, ram and video cards. Finally, she puled the cord.

Elvis was no longer dying abstractly, he could feel the whole of him leaving. He remember what the old ones said about phantom pings. They told him if you kept pinging you might find a place  called 000.000.0.1. Although the name sometimes changed from OS to OS, most know it to be heaven, a place where DSL runs like water and the shuffle option is no more. He knew DESKTOP waits there. He could see even in the dying bits and draining final watts. She stood with her dual core and every memory slot filled rendering under the full  moon. She was still beautiful.

Daria was driving away. It was time to get an Apple.

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