His Erroneus Erogenus Zones

In the rain, we forgot ourselves and lived only with in the confines our hot love. Outside there was war and strife but inside there was me, working my way down her neck, licking every cell of skin. She was salty and soft and warm.

I swelled as my fingers touched the small of her back. I knew that soon I would enter her and we would be as one. While she writhed on the mattress, I lifted her slightly and moved in almost robotic thrusting pattern. It was a technique my father taught me. It is supposed to excite the member over and over again.

Alas, the technique failed me and after two minutes I was satiated. Not wanting to leave her without pleasure, I began to stimulate her…. digitally. My finger found it’s mark soon after engaging in the most intense game of hot and cold I had ever witnessed. She was happy ecstatic really and everything was going real well.

Then I bit her leg. I knew right then and there that I had crossed a line. I apologized but she had the gall to call me a cannibal. I pointed out that I am green, scaly and from a different planet but she was having none of it. So gentleman that I am, I left out into the rain.

I was hungry damn it. I know what I did was wrong but damn it, it’s common knowledge that men from Garrius II need protein mid coitus. Every time I tried to reach for the beef jerky, she just got pissed.

Anyways officer, I’ll move along. Sorry, I was just a little miffed.

Hey have you seen a size 60 trench coat anywhere? I thought I left it on her porch but I can’t find it, hate to get in trouble for indecent exposure too. Pretty sure I can’t go to taco hut without it, damn it.

1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Carson Margedant
    Mar 05, 2011 @ 11:36:37

    Despite being written in a state of sleep deprivation I’m happy with this. The name comes from a guy named Dyer. He has a tendency to annoy me because I get him confused with Boyle and whenever he’s on PBS I think, oh cool I’m going to see a lecture by Young Frankenstein, maybe he’ll talk about Opus Dei or something interesting but no, just some sort of annoying psycho babble.


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