Godless, Thanks To Felicity

There was a god but he was never very interested in the going ons of Felicity. Felicity was so whimsical and incredibly destructive that her god could no longer take responsibility for the universe of which she resided. He wasn’t the first to abdicate but he was the first to do so do to the actions of a seven year old girl.

What pray tell could make a god leave his, her, its or their collective post? It was the adding of tuna to a peanut butter sandwich, which Felicity proceeded to enjoy thoroughly. Really, it was the enjoyment that put the god over the top. The enjoyment was an affront to the exact design of the human taste buds, and that no good god could not abide. Sadly, he could not bring himself to smite her so he left.

So, now you understand why I had to pour finger paint all over Felicity. She ate a peanut butter and tuna sandwich and forced God to abandon us. She is the reason we are godless now, and yet you dare admonish me? Mother, how cruel you are.

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